Today was Grandma's funeral. I saw her body for the last time; but surprisingly, I didn't feel sad! I felt what can only be described as peace. Peace that she left her earthly body behind that had given her so many struggles and blessings, Peace that she wasn't really gone. That definitely is the only way my sisters and I were able to get through our song--she wasn't really gone. I think that if she could talk to me now, she would say she enjoyed her funeral, and she would probably say that she didn't deserve all the wonderful things her sons said about her today. But of course, everything shared at the pulpit today was the absolute truth.
My Mom and Aunt made these wonderful little memory books for the family, with small messages from everyone inside. On the front is a picture of Grandma when she was about 20; she is so beautiful!! And what gets me is that she's wearing no make-up. None!
I's glad I had little Lindy to hold for most of the service. She was a stinker by her standards, and still pretty dang good. Everyone comments on how good of a baby she is. Yesterday Dad told me that whenever the grief got to him bad, his antidote was to just look at one of our sweet babies and he would feel immediately better. I think that Grandma would agree; she was almost always holding a baby it seems! In half of the pictures on the slideshow Brother Bill made for us, she's holding someones baby : )
I sure miss her, but it's getting better day by day. Sometimes it just hits me that she won't hold one of my babies and I can't help but cry. But then I can almost see her with one of my future children on her lap, just waiting to send them down to me and Curtis wrapped in her love.